Who am I fooling? I can't cook. Or maybe I can, I really don't know. I don't cook. Sure, every now and then (Christmas and Mother's Day) we have people over, so I toss a few shrimp on the barbie and hope that my Martha-esque veggie tray will distract people (dip in a bell pepper! Mia, you're a genius!). But other than that, we eat simply. It's stuff that either a bright dog could whip together (canned food + dry food = delicacy!) or it's take out. I know, I know, expensive... blah blah BLAH... but that's not even what makes me feel dumb.
I watch Food Network all. the. time. And especially love the Saturday morning cooking shows "see, even lazy a-holes like you can make this!" I take a lot of my cheap tricks from those shows. Love, love, love.
Although I have to admit to one cheat : I was making chocolate whipped cream for Mother's Day (to go with strawberries - yum!) and I didn't have the cocoa powder that the recipe called for - really, who does? does ANYONE keep cocoa in the cupboard? Shut up, no you don't! - and so I used the next best thing : instant hot chocolate mix. And you know what? It was freaking GOOD. Yeah, sure, I should have read the packet and realized that it was the kind with the mini marshmallows, but I didn't. And now I have this vat (approximate size) of choco whipped cream in the freezer* that has little floaty marshmallows in it. But is that really so bad? I mean, aren't marshmallows essentially whipped cream that just got frozen in time?
*you probably know, but I didn't, that whipping cream QUADRUPLES in volume when you mix it up. Already in the memory bank file : don't use the small bowl