Monday, September 08, 2003

...should not operate heavy machinery

Reading J.R.'s entry for Sunday , reminded me of a story...

When I was in high school, I had a friend : Justin. Justin's house had one of those steep sloped backyards and at the top of the slope was a cemetery [interesting but unnecessary fact : Nicole Brown Simpson is buried there].

When the cemetery wanted to expand, they had to approach all of the home owners to get their permission, because they would be inching closer to the edge of the cemetery land and toward the slopes that go downhill into the backyards. At first the home owners protested and screamed "No way! Did you see Poltergeist?!" but then the cemetery people offered each home owner something like $10,000 and so they said "hey - you are always welcome to bury people in my yard. Seriously, no problem dude."

During the expansion, many pieces of heavy equipment were used (back hoes and bulldozers and the like) and piqued the interest of a bunch of high school losers, like us. So, one night after much contemplating and several alcoholic beverages, the gang decided to go up there and drive the equipment.

Oh, the fun that was had! There were mini races and many a "look what I can do!" proclaimed. Until Justin tried to drive the back hoe up a mound of dirt. Well, that's not what back hoes are designed to do, and so the thing tipped over. Sideways. Justin was trapped and everyone sucked in their breath and ran over to hear "Woo hoo! Did you see that?!" It took everyone working together to get Justin out from under the back hoe, but we couldn't possibly tip the whole thing back up. So we did what any responsible, drunk, sixteen year old would do. We puked. And then we ran home, back down the hill to Justin's yard.

Unfortunately, the incident was never reported to the police and thus escaped the Police Blotter in the local paper. Fortunately, the incident was never reported and the drunken teenagers involved escaped unharmed.

No comments:


Blog Widget by LinkWithin